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Methods for Anger Management

Ubqari Magazine - December 2013

Abu Labeeb Shaazli

Imam sahib said, how did I defeat him? That person said that I was having a dialogue with a friend. I was of the opinion that hazrat Sufian Sauri (RA) was the most placable and he is saint having no anger.

The Strange Incident of Imam Abu Hanifa (RA)

One day imam Abu Hanifa (RA) went home after the zuhr prayers. His home was on the upper floor. In order to rest he lied down on the bed. In the meantime someone knocked on the door. Just imagine that a person who had stayed awake for the whole night and was busy for the whole day, what would be his state at that moment. At this time if someone comes in then how much irritated he feels about it that this person has arrived out of time. But imam sahib stood up, went downstairs, opened the door and saw that one person is standing. Imam sahib asked him the reason for his visit? He said that he wanted to know about a problem. Look, the first thing is that when imam sahib was sitting to explain the solutions, he did not come to ask over there. Now he had come to disturb in an untimely manner. But imam sahib did not say anything to him. Rather he said, ok brother, what do you want to know? He replied, what should I say, when I was coming at that time I had it in my mind that what problem I wanted to ask. But now I have forgotten. I cannot remember that what problem I had to ask. Imam sahib said, ok when you remember it then come to me and ask about it. You did not say anything bad to him. Neither did you (RA) scold him. Rather went back quietly. While he had only lied in the bed, the door knocked again. You asked about the matter. He said, sir, that problem has come to my mind. You (RA) said, ok ask. He said that I remembered it till recently but when you reached half of the stairs, I forgot it again. If it had been an ordinary person then what would have been his level of annoyance. But imam sahib had a selfless personality. Imam sahib said, ok brother when it comes to your mind then ask me and went back and lied down in the bed. Now you had only lied down that the door knocked again. You went downstairs again. When you opened the door, you found the person standing in front of you again. He said, hazrat! I remember that problem now. Imam sahib asked, what is that problem? He said, I want to know that whether the taste of human shit is bitter or sweet?

 Now It May Have Crossed The Threshold of Patience

If there had been another person, even if he had been enduring till this point, now his patience may have come to an end. But imam sahib replied with a lot of contentment that if the shit is fresh, it is slightly sweet and if it becomes dry it becomes bitter. Then that person started asking, Have you tasted it? Hazrat imam Abu Hanifa (RA) said, the taste of everything is not known by tasting it, rather of a few things the taste is obtained by wisdom. And it comes to know through wisdom that a fly sits on the fresh bowl and it does not sit on the dry bowl. Due to this we infer that there is a difference between both of them. Otherwise the fly would have sat on both of them.

A Polite Person of His Times

When Imam sahib gave this reply, that person said. Imam sahib! I join my hands in front of you. Please forgive me. I have disturbed you a lot. But today you have defeated me. Imam sahib said, how did I defeat you? He said that I was having a dialogue with a friend. I was of the opinion that hazrat Sufian Sauri (RA) was the politest and the softest saint. And my friend was of the opinion that the most forgiving and anger-less saint is Imam Abu Hanifa (RA). And both of us had an argument. And now to judge we thought about this method that I come to your house at this hour of the day when you have to take rest. Make you run up and down for a number of times. And then ask you a very shameless question. And see if you get angry or not. I said that if you get angry then I will win and if you do not become angry then he will win. But today you have defeated me. And the reality is that I have not seen a person as polite as you are in the whole land who has not even been touched by anger. There is no one other than you. Just imagine from this that what was your place. If the angels do not envy such a person then who else would they envy. He had completely rubbed away his self and desires.

Softness Beautifies

Thus Hazrat Muhammad (may Allah’s peace and blessings be upon him) said the following prayers: (ALLAHUMMA 'AGNINI BIL 'ILMI, WAZAYYINNI BIL' HILMI (Kinz-ul-amaal). O Allah! Make me generous by giving me knowledge and give me the beauty of softness; meaning make me graceful. A person has knowledge but does not have softness and tolerance, and then despite that knowledge the person cannot obtain aesthetics and beauty.

The first thing to walk on this path and to control the self it is important to abandon anger. That is why it was said, do not be angry. This is the first lesson and this is the small advice. And this is the method for staying safe from the wrath of Allah Almighty.

The Methods for Staying Anger-Free

It is not only that you have been only advised to stay away from anger. Rather Quran-e-kareem has prescribed methods to stay away from anger and Hazrat Muhammad (may Allah’s peace and blessings be upon him) has also prescribed some methods. With the help of this an exercise is done to suppress the anger. The first thing is that the anger that ensues unintentionally and the upheaval it creates within the self, there is no check and balance about that with Allah Almighty. Because that is out of control of the human. But the upheaval that is produced in the self is also not sinful. But if you kill someone as a result of this anger, or scold or abuse someone, then this is a bad thing. Then it is as if you have fulfilled the requirement of anger. Now this is sinful.

Recite Aoozobillah  اَعُوْذُ بِاللہِ مِنَ الشَّیْطٰنِ الرَّجِیْمِ  at the time of Anger

So whenever an upheaval or uneasiness is produced in the personality then the first thing you should do is what has been advised by Allah Almighty in Quran-e-hakeem. Thus, it was said that when the devil disturbs you in anyway then seek refuge of Allah from the Satan and recite aoozobillah... O Allah!

 اَعُوْذُ بِاللہِ I seek your refuge from the devil. Now inshaAllah Allah Almighty will save you from the bad consequences of this anger. Thus make it a habit that whenever you get angry, recite aaozobillah at once. This is not a difficult thing, it only requires a bit of practice.

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